The work: Finding your authentic self and desires, free of shame and guilt; acknowledging, honoring, and moving beyond past experiences and traumas; and from that foundation building richer and more honest relationships.
The above says it all, and is so much easier said than done. We’re all such complex beings shaped and constricted by layers of shame, guilt, and trauma, that finding your way through to who you really are, and what you really want (as opposed to who you think you should be and should want) can be really difficult. So let’s work with that.
We’ll start by focusing on what you want and don’t want. It’s entirely possible that you don’t know – the funny thing about desires is that they may change over time, and no longer are what you thought they were. Or what you think they should be. And so a big part of this work is exploration of your desires both by talking and doing, and really feeling into our bodies to sense how each one makes us feel.
This may be a good moment to mention that while the erotic is a focus of sacred intimacy, this does not mean that every session or every client needs to include that. Sometimes what’s called for is emotional intimacy, to be seen, heard, and held, perhaps paired with non-erotic touch. Part of our work together is figuring out what it is that you need without preconceived ideas or expectations.
In exploring our desires we learn to communicate about what we like and don’t like, and by extension to ask for what we want (imagine that!)
Finally, having asked for what you want, you will get to experience what it is like to have your request be well met, and if possible, fulfilled.
This will likely not be a single journey. Much more likely is a succession of small (or large) realizations and breakthroughs, all the while navigating an emotional landscape made up out of societal conditioning, fear, guilt, shame, and trauma (and replace that with joy, pleasure, self acceptance, and growth!)
And the final piece of the puzzle? Discovering, embracing, and loving your authentic self.
Being fully seen and accepted for who you truly are, figuring out and embracing what you truly want, learning how to eloquently and skillfully communicate that, and to then get to experience that in a safe and nonjudgemental setting – that is powerful, not to mention healing.
Last but not least, having experienced this in session you are now so much better equipped to go out into the world and use what you have learned, where it will have a meaningful impact on existing and new relationships, both within and outside of the erotic realm.
Up next: About me and who I work with